Pushing back on those fees can feel awkward, but it’s honestly one of the best moves you can make. I’ve bought a handful of properties over the years, and I’d say at least half the time, there’s some “processing fee” or “courier charge” that just vanishes when I ask about it. The first time I tried, I was convinced I’d blow up the whole deal. But the reality? Most lenders or agents expect you to ask questions. If you don’t, they’re happy to pad things out.
Here’s how I usually handle it: I’ll go through the closing disclosure line by line, and if something looks weird or vague, I just ask what it’s for. Sometimes I’ll literally say, “Can you explain this one?” or “Is this negotiable?” Nine times out of ten, they’ll either lower it or take it off completely. One time, I had a “document prep fee” that was $400. When I asked about it, they dropped it to $100 without blinking. Wild.
Now, not every lender is flexible—some dig in their heels. But even then, just asking puts you in a better spot. Worst case, they say no and you move on. Best case, you save a few hundred bucks.
I get that it feels risky to push back, especially if you’re new to the process or really want the house. But honestly, if a deal falls apart just because you asked about a fee, that’s probably a red flag anyway. The good ones want your business and expect you to be thorough.
One thing I wish someone had told me early on: keep your cool and treat it like a business transaction, not a personal negotiation. You’re not being difficult—you’re just making sure you know what you’re paying for.
It’s kind of like haggling at a flea market... if you don’t ask, you’ll never know what’s actually negotiable.
The first time I bought a house, I swear I thought the “miscellaneous” line item was just some kind of real estate inside joke. Like, are we paying for snacks at the closing table or what? I remember seeing a $275 “courier fee” and picturing someone hand-delivering my paperwork on horseback. When I asked about it, they suddenly “found a way to waive it.” Shocking.
It always feels weird to push back, but honestly, my wallet thanks me every time. The trick for me is pretending I’m reviewing a restaurant bill—if I don’t recognize the charge, I ask. Sometimes you get that awkward silence, but more often than not, they’ll shave something off.
One thing that still gets me is how random some of these fees are. Last round, there was a “technology fee” for $150. For what? Emailing me PDFs? I said as much (half-joking), and poof—it disappeared.
Moral of the story: if you’re not sure about a fee, just ask. Worst case, you get an eye roll. Best case, you save enough for pizza in your new place.
Totally get where you’re coming from. I felt ridiculous the first time I questioned a “processing fee” that seemed made up, but it magically disappeared too. It’s awkward, but you’re right—asking saves money. Feels weird at first, but it’s worth it.
I know exactly what you mean about feeling awkward. The first time I pushed back on a “document prep fee,” I half-expected the agent to laugh at me or say it was non-negotiable. Instead, she just shrugged and took it off the paperwork like it was no big deal. It kind of blew my mind how much of this stuff is just tacked on hoping we won’t notice or question it.
Honestly, I wish I’d been bolder earlier in the process. There were a few other charges I let slide because I didn’t want to rock the boat, but looking back, that was money down the drain. It’s weird how something as big as buying a house can make you feel like you shouldn’t speak up, but if you don’t, you’re the one paying for it—literally. I get that some fees are legit, but there’s definitely room to push back on the ones that seem fishy. It’s uncomfortable at first, but once you see it work, it gets easier.
Honestly, I’ve seen that “document prep fee” trick more times than I can count. The first time I bought a place, I was so nervous about looking difficult that I just nodded along and paid whatever they put in front of me. Now, I tell folks: treat every line item like it’s negotiable until proven otherwise. My routine is to ask for clarification on every single fee—sometimes it’s legit, sometimes it magically disappears. It feels awkward at first, but your wallet will thank you later. If you’re not sure about a charge, just ask, “Is this required by law or can we discuss it?” You’d be surprised how often the answer is “Oh, we can take that off…”
